A friend of mine is struggling because her father lives across country. However it recently came to her attention that dad needs more care than some of his nice friends can provide. He is diabetic, not taking his insulin properly, does not bathe on a regular basis and his diet is not good. Top this off with the fact that he has poor vision and hearing. Terry is hesitant to move her father to be nearer to her because of the amount of “stuff” in his home. Dad, over the years, has had hobbies and collected boxes and rooms of stuff. The question to be asked is what is more important, stuff that will mean nothing to anyone when a person dies or care and quality of life? Many parents not wanting to give up their stuff will argue. This is the time when the child must take the role of a parent and be very clear that taking care of oneself is far more important than owning stuff. The result of this situation is that Terry moved her father to a very good assisted living community near her with a few items that were of most importance and he is now well cared for and has the ability to socialize with others which is often a benefit for an individual who previously lived in society but was relatively isolated. In this case it’s quality of life over stuff. How much stuff do you have sitting around your home that you haven’t touched in years that might be donated to a charity? Getting rid of stuff can make you feel lighter.

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