Elder Care Consultant – Meet with Pamela D Wilson
As an elder care consultant, Pamela D Wilson helps families and aging adults plan for and manage senior care needs. Experience consulting for aging parents and navigating care on a 1;1 basis for more than twenty years allows Pamela to offer unique insights that solve routine and complex concerns.
Whether you are new to caregiving or aging—or have been involved for years caring for yourself or family members—a phone consultation or virtual meeting with Pamela can offer insights to help you plan for or manage care needs.
To Schedule a Meeting with Pamela D Wilson (Scroll to the Bottom of this Page and Complete the Form)
If you are interested in learning more about Pamela as an elder care consultant and how she can support discussions and planning for aging care needs, scroll to the bottom of this page and complete the form to contact Pamela.
Elder Care Consultant Topics For Discussion:
- Evaluating current care situations to identify priorities
- How to talk to loved ones about care needs—those who refuse help, exhibit negative tendencies or apathy
- Discussing health concerns to develop proactive strategies
- Navigating care with the healthcare system
- Decisions about hiring in-home care agencies
- Coordinating relationships with multiple care providers
- Managing care needs to minimize or maintain advancing concerns
- The right time to move to a care community: independent, assisted living or memory care or a nursing home
- Evaluating memory loss concerns and planning for care
- Advocating for care when providers disagree, fail to follow through or other concerns exist
- Discussing health insurance, long term care insurance, Medicare, and Medicaid planning
- Financial planning and budgeting for care needs
- Legal planning for care needs (power of attorney, guardianship, living wills, wills, or trusts)
- DNR (do not resuscitate) documents vs. a living will
- End of life care discussions, palliative care, hospice care
- Community services
- Navigating family relationships: spousal caregiving, adult child caregiving, elderly caregivers caring for the elderly
- How to balance the challenges of giving up your life or a job to care for aging parents or a spouse
- Why women need to be more proactive in planning for care in later life
- The stages of caregiving
- Estimating care costs for a sick spouse faced with a divorce settlement
- Cultural differences or religious beliefs about the duty to care for aging parents
- Abusive care situations, working with Adult Protective Services, self-neglect, mandatory reporting
Aging Parent Consultations
Managing the day-to-day needs of aging parents can be easy to deal with until an unexpected change or health event happens, and mom or dad need more care. Suddenly, caregivers may be faced with providing medical-type care and navigating the health care system. Scheduling an aging parent consultation can save caregivers time, money, and worry by providing insights and the confidence to manage care situations.
Time pressures increase as more care is needed. Adult children working full time, raising their own families, going to school, and working to balance life may feel overwhelmed trying to do it all. Caregivers feel pressured or guilty for doing the best they can, which may never seem to be enough.
Siblings may refuse or be unable to help care for aging parents. The health conditions of aging parents may worsen. When life goes off course, and you’re not sure what to do or how to plan for what’s next, a thirty or sixty-minute aging parent consultation may help prioritize essential aspects of caring for aging parents and yourself.
Senior Care Consultations
Adults aging without the support of a partner, spouse, or nearby family members—called solo-agers— have a greater need to make future plans for care and the costs of care. Pamela works with aging adults interested in being proactive about managing current and future health and financial concerns. A senior care consultation can give you the confidence that you have plans in place to handle unexpected events.
Wilson discusses how to identify family or professionals to serve as future decision-makers for medical care and financial needs. Wilson’s experience as a court-appointed guardian, a medical and financial power of attorney, the personal representative of the estate, and trustee, encompasses all of the aspects that adult children, caregivers, and aging adults experience throughout the care journey.
Elder Care Consultant – Pamela D Wilson Reduces Worry and Stress
As an eldercare consultant, Pamela experienced the loss of both parents, a brother, sister, grandparents, aunts, uncles, dear friends, and managed care for elderly clients at the end of their lives. She provides compassionate and empathetic support with difficult and uncomfortable topics. There are no silly questions—only questions that clients may feel embarrassed to ask.
As an elder care consultant, the care navigator, and advocate for adults who need care, Pamela believes that becoming more educated about health and questions to ask healthcare providers helps clients make informed and better decisions. Having early conversations about care and care planning ensures that adults caring for themselves and aging parents have the opportunity to make the best choices.
These aging parent consultations can work to balance the needs of elderly parents and caregivers especially in cultures where wide differences exist between care for elderly parents and self-care for the caregiver. Self-care is essential to preserve the caregiver’s ability to provide ongoing care for aging parents.
Navigating Cultural Differences in Caregiving
While family relationships can be challenging as the result of early parent-child relationships, initiating care conversations can give parents and children clarity about care responsibilities and commitments to provide care. Caregiving relationships are different by culture, religion, and the behaviors that aging parents modeled for children about care responsibilities.
Saying no to caregiving responsibilities can be unacceptable because a “no” may mean family rejection and abandonment. Preserving family harmony may be a belief that extends beyond self-sacrifice made by an adult child caregiver—who is usually female. In these cultures, caregivers feel that they have to internalize problems and suffer adversity.
Feelings of guilt can be a motivator for adult children. Rather than being selfish about their needs, they choose to focus on the needs of an aging parent. These beliefs are more relevant in Asian, Hispanic, and African cultures—even in the United States. These caregivers view the act of caregiving as something one does without question.
The difference between cultures that place the care of parents over their own well-being—versus cultures that support independence and self-responsibility—may be that parents modeled the act of caregiving for their children. Many European and American caregivers had few or no direct examples of caregiving by aging parents.
Caregivers with a belief in independence and self-responsibility for care may be more interested in establishing care boundaries or equitable care situations with aging parents. These caregiving adults may choose to work with an elder care consultant to make plans so that caregiving responsibilities are not pushed down to adult children or future generations without some type of plan to support care costs.
When parents do not model caregiving behaviors for children, the foundation to view caregiving as an expected or normal life responsibility may be missing. In American and European cultures, personal responsibility versus cultural beliefs has a greater influence on the duty to care for aging parents but to different degrees. In all situations, siblings may have very different opinions and reactions about the responsibility to care for aging parents.
Caregivers Who Fail to Care For Themselves Fail to Care for Aging Parents
The idea of supporting aging parents and other family members without question brings up the concern of harm to the emotional and physical health of the caregiver that is well researched and documented throughout the world. Regardless of cultural beliefs about keeping caregiving responsibilities within the family, seeking outside support or finding volunteer or paid caregivers can give family caregivers a break and time to care for themselves.
Time away from caregiving can allow adult children time to spend with spouses, children and maintain careers to support their families and the care of aging parents financially. When the caregiver breaks down in any aspect of life—care for aging parents may no longer be possible.
The dedicated caregiver may become the person who needs care. Rather than looking at seeking help as a negative, utilizing support and help for caregivers is a way to provide ongoing and compassionate care for aging parents.
If you feel stuck within your family about caregiving responsibilities, consider an elder care consultation with Pamela to discuss potential options for caring for yourself, aging parents, and ideas to preserve your health, well-being, and family life so that you can continue to support aging parents.
Visit Our Support Page to Learn About Other Programs Available for Caregivers
©2021 Pamela D. Wilson. All Rights Reserved.