A friend of mine, Kristen, has multiple sclerosis. Her sister, Debbie, offered to move in with her to provide care and the situation turned disastrous. Debbie nearly convinced Kristen to purchase a three story home. Thinking about this, how practical would a three story home be for an individual who is wheelchair bound? Debbie’s thinking was that Kristen could live in the basement and the rest of the house would be for her. How would you like to live in a dark basement for the rest of your life? Then there were other events, times when Kristen needed medical care and Debbie told her it was all in her mind. Time when Debbie would not come home for days at a time and Kristen needed help. Debbie now tells Kristen that she is entitled to have of the house and half of Kristen’s disability payments for everything she has sacrificed for her. Unfortunately there are many times when the self interest of a family member results in disadvantage for another family member. After months of issues Kristen is finally coming to the conclusion that she needs to do what is best for herself and not provide for the needs of her sister who is fully capable mentally and physically of caring for herself.

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About Pamela Wilson

PAMELA D. WILSON, MS, BS/BA, NCG, CSA helps caregivers and aging adults solve caregiving problems and manage caregiving needs through online programs, live support groups, and an extensive caregiving library that includes articles, podcasts, videos, and webinars.

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