The Kentucky Derby is running today and there was a horse that threw his jockey prior to the race. The announcers were questioning how this might affect the jockey prior to the race. It was agreed this could have a significant affect — not because the jockey was not injured, but because of the mental state of the jockey regarding the embarrassment of being thrown off the horse and the jockey’s confidence to navigate the horse. It’s often been said that a horse will make a liar out of a man. The same can be said of caregiving. My sister promised my mother she would return home to care for her when the need arose. When the time came, my sister could neither come home to care for my mother or give up her job to do so. Many times in caregiving situations we make promises with good intentions that it’s just not possible to keep when the time comes. Until one has experienced the burden of caregiving it’s impossible to know what it’s like to live in the day to day shoes of a caregiver. I’ve met with many spouses who underestimated the commitment to care for a spouse until the end of life. They feel ashamed when they have to place their loved one in a care facility.