If you haven’t been involved in the financial aspect of caring for another person yet you’re fortunate. Many spouses are burdened with care. Some have the financial resources and will never have to worry. Others have long term care insurance to support the care. Others will eventually become impoverished because they will spend every last penny caring for a loved one. It’s at the point when finances become tight that difficult decisions are forced. I have a friend who has had his brother in a private room in a nursing home for years and is now faced with the reality of Medicaid, which does not pay for private rooms, only shared rooms. While the private room was nice for his brother all of these years, having to share a room will be a very difficult transition. I have other clients who have been able to maintain a home and are now having to consider selling the home in order to have funds to pay for rent at an assisted living facility. These types of transitions, no matter how necessary still represent loss and the need to grieve. They can become difficult because it can seem that there is no choice and that the situation is not going to improve. It’s in these situations that we need to help our friends or family members with glimpses of hope. The possibility that a room mate, the right one, can be a blessing in our life, the possibility that we may make new friends in an assisted living facility and the freedom not caring for a home will provide. It’s at these times that we need to pull out all the stops and toss self pity out the window in order to replace worrisome thoughts with positive thoughts.

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About Pamela Wilson

PAMELA D. WILSON, MS, BS/BA, NCG, CSA helps caregivers and aging adults solve caregiving problems and manage caregiving needs through online programs, live support groups, and an extensive caregiving library that includes articles, podcasts, videos, and webinars.

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